Monday, 17 February 2014

It's a Full-Time Job....

                 Why do some women feel shame in admitting they want to be a "house wife" or "stay at home Mom" ? Maybe it's this wave of women power that has been washing over us for the last decade or so. While this .. dare I say 'feminist movement' has benefited in encouraging women to leave the home and to stay away from marriage dependency; I feel like this movement has backfired on all the women that have chosen (key word: chosen) to stay at home. Who says being a stay at home Mom is not a full time job? I may not be married or living on my own or raising kids of my own but I can still say I have experienced first handedly as a child of a stay at home Mom for 15 years of my life and as a child of a working Mom for the last 5 years, a difference in our home life. 
            I can tell you that home cooked meals do not taste the same when my Mom has cooked them in less than 2 hours because she is tired from being at school and work all day. I can tell you that our home may only get cleaned on weekends now. I can tell you we do not accept company as often as we did before because frankly neither our home or my Mom are in any condition to be having weekly dinner parties like we did in the past. Some of you can argue that this is a woman's lack of ability to maintain a balance between her home and work life but that would mean that you are telling me that women can have it all... and that is a whole other story ill save for another post. I'm not writing this to tell you my view on the solution, I'm not even here to tell you that stay at home Moms are better mothers than working women, because that would be an ignorant thing to say. What I hope to have accomplished from writing this is to get you to think with an open mind the next time a woman tells you she is a stay at home Mom. Do not quickly assume that she is oppressed or trapped in a marriage with a dictating husband. Do not underestimate the work these women go through on a daily basis, and do not overlook any of their accomplishments. Whether it is mastering a recipe or getting their child to their high school graduation; it is an accomplishment. 
          I simply think stay at home Moms deserve more praise then they receive (if they receive any at all.) I recently came across a quote during my studies and this quote is what inspired me to write this post in the first place 
      "If you educate a boy, you educate a man, but if you educate a girl, you educate a family"
 I feel like there is so much I can say about this subject but ill stop here for now... maybe this is enough to spark a thought or opinion from you and I would love to hear your voice on this subject :) 


  1. Salaam Lena,

    I completely agree with you on this one. My mum is (and has always been) a stay-at-home mum... and the older I get, the more I appreciate it. When I was younger, I was adamant that I wanted to have it all - successful career woman/nurturing mum/attentive wife. I finished uni and started my first job recently, and since then, my perspective has completely changed. I know that many women juggle all three roles (and do so successfully to some degree), but the more roles you take on, the more you have to divide your time and attention. More sacrifices have to be made, and you have to be really good at prioritizing. The problem is, because many jobs are not flexible, you end up having to cut corners at home. I've actually been thinking about this topic a lot lately, so I'm glad someone else has picked up on this! People need to understand that this whole feminism movement is meant to provide women with more choice, rather than a literal equality to men. Anyway, apologies for my essay... lol! I tend to ramble on when something interests me >_<

    1. Salaam!
      I really enjoyed reading your response because I am/have been what you went through. I also always thought I could have it all, the successful jobs, successful marriage and house but now that I am almost done university I am beginning to realize that sacrifices will have to be made just as you said. We shouldn't look at these sacrifices as a bad thing either, I feel like it is natural perhaps even necessary. I 100% agree with your statement on the feminist movement and how It's purpose is to give women more choices.
      JAK for your insightful comment. I feel like we could say so much about this topic and more people do need to discuss it! :)